Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Dear Mother Nature, we need to have a little talk with Jack Frost.


It is March 27. We are now SEVEN days into spring. Not winter. Spring. SPRING. Ess-pee-rrr-eye-en-gee S-P-R-I-N-G.  
The view out my window?


We need to adjust things a little bit here. And don't go playing the "northern climate" card on me. 
I do not live in Alaska. 
I do not live in the northern reaches of Maine. 
I don't even live in the southern parts of Maine-or anywhere near it! 
I live in New York. I am about half way between 40 and 45 degrees latitude. 

IT IS SPRING. 

I am glad you want us to know that you have some power over that nasty Global Warming. It really is a deep concern. However, you don't need to prove your point now
Christmas was in December. We didn't have snow for Christmas this year. Do you think maybe we could re-arrange things a little bit? I'd actually be OK if we only had snow for the Christmas holiday, but I know that is asking a bit much. So, I will suck it up and deal until spring. Every dog has it's day and all that jazz. 
Notice that I didn't call you up and ask you to cut it short seeing how I am not a winter fan? I have been patient and understanding. After all, winter is the time for snow and I don't live at the equator Or even at the 35th parallel. My fault. I take responsibility for that and I'll hibernate for those winter months I hate so much so you can have your time. 
I am sorry, but your time is up on March 20th. I am not even overly fond of early spring with all of it's mud and muck. I am more a fan of the blooming things part of it, but I'm eagerly awaiting the mud and muck after this winter. If I am actually looking forward to it there has got to be something wrong. 
Or hell has frozen over-and I am pretty sure it has. Just look at my back yard. There's a foot of snow there and it's coming down by the bucket. 
So, I'd really appreciate it if Jack could give some courtesy to the OTHER seasons and get the hell out.  
Thanks so much for listening! 

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